As I write this, one of my little children is in my sisterwife’s kitchen eating the dinner she made, and one of her little children is in my kitchen eating the dinner I made. Which would you choose: French Toast or Beef & Broccoli?
I suppose someone might ask, “Why not just have one kitchen and one dinner?” There are plenty of answers to that question which I will save for another time.
For now I want to focus on the fact that it sure is nice to live with someone who has your back all the time.
Years ago, we had the opportunity to ask a lovely woman if she’d like to be courted (i.e., if she’d like to spend more time with us and pursue joining the family). My husband Joshua had arranged for her to come over to our house at a specific time. He was planning to pop the question, as it were (the question being essentially, “May I court you?”).
The arrangement allowed for my sisterwife Melissa and me to both be present, be part of the conversation. We were supportive of the idea of Joshua courting her, and we wanted to be a part of the process.
I had a little baby at the time, and at the crucial time with this woman, my baby needed to be put to bed. It killed me that I would have to miss the conversation, but I excused myself and retreated to my bedroom with my infant.
I’ll never forget what Melissa did. I didn’t ask for this and I didn’t expect it. My sisterwife looked at the situation – me out of the room taking care of the baby, missing all the action, feeling totally left out – and she did what Jesus taught in the Golden Rule: She did what she would want me to do.
When I had to leave the living room, Melissa left the living room as well. She came into my bedroom with me to put the baby to bed. She sat and talked to me while Joshua sat in the living room talking to our female friend.
In a beautiful act of loyalty and love, Melissa thought to herself, If Charlotte doesn’t get to be part of the conversation, then neither do I. And she acted on that thought, at her own expense.
This is the kind of attitude I get to have in my sisterwife. She is extremely loyal, and she always tries to look at things from my point-of-view.
I am extremely blessed to have a sisterwife who thinks of me, considers me, loves me, and shows me regularly that we are united, we are on the same team.
As another example, we occasionally hear of a plural husband who doesn’t split his time evenly between his wives. Melissa gets on a soap box about it, but her rant isn’t about watching out for herself; it’s her watching out for me: “If Joshua came to my bedroom two nights in a row, I’d kick him out and make him go to Charlotte’s bedroom! What are those women doing that they allow their plural husband to treat their sisterwives unfairly? They ought to be ashamed! Sisterwives need to watch out for each other!”
I could go on and on with illustrations of Melissa’s keeping the Golden Rule over the years. Loyalty is one of the greatest virtues in plural marriage. Melissa is a wonderful example of how sisterwives ought to watch out for each other.
Speaking of Polygamy... 