Tag: healthy polygamy

Ideal Sisterwife Relationship

Sisterwives ideally:

  • Have a special kind of relationship
  • Love each other
  • Love themselves
  • Pray for one other
  • Pray with each other
  • Keep the big picture in mind
  • Support each other
  • Accept each other for who they are
  • Correct each other only occasionally, and only when their relationship is good enough to allow the same kind of corrections that friends gently give each other
  • Love each other’s children
  • Feel happy for each other
  • Celebrate with each other
  • Are not envious
  • Mourn with each other
  • Are patient with each other
  • Have a good memory for the good times and a poor memory for the bad times
  • Stand up for each other
  • Respect each other
  • Are excited to see each other
  • Are secure in their husband’s love for them
  • Make the people around them think, Watching that family, I finally understand the desire to live plural marriage.
  • Apologize quickly
  • Help each other
  • Accept help
  • Are friends
  • Are not envious
  • Make each other laugh
  • Smile when the other one comes into the room
  • Watch out for each other’s best interests
  • Are long-suffering with each other
  • Miss each other when they’re not together
  • Cooperate
  • Don’t compete
  • Want what’s best for each other
  • Are grateful for each other
  • Compliment each other
  • Complement each other
  • Are kind to each other
  • Admit when they’re wrong
  • Assume good intentions
  • Trust one another
  • Share some things, but are also free to have their own things
  • Do some things together, but also have their autonomy
  • See things from the other’s point of view
  • Wouldn’t want their husband to be monogamous
  • Speak up for the other
  • Forgive each other freely
  • Don’t keep grudges
  • Are the first to show up and the last to leave
  • Honor each other
  • Have humility
  • Learn from each other
  • Are better for knowing one another
  • Have fun together
  • Share the same goals for the family
  • Keep the Golden Rule
  • Grow old together

We Rock the Polygamy Life

The internet has no shortage of places to discuss reality TV shows such as “Sister Wives”.

My friend hangs out on one such Facebook group. The other day this was posted (by someone I don’t personally know):

My friend texted me before commenting to make sure I was fine with her response, because she wanted to talk about me and my family. This is what she wrote:

On one hand I can see the point-of-view of the original poster, but on the other hand, I believe plural marriage has the potential to be a beautiful way of living. Nothing valuable comes easily. Having lived both monogamy (for 11 years) and polygamy (for 9 years), I say from my experience that I prefer polygamy and wouldn’t choose monogamy. I have no regrets. I am not in an abusive relationship, my children spend lots of time with their father, and I am grateful for my sisterwife and my life wouldn’t be the same without her.

I am grateful to have a family that is a good example of healthy polygamy, as evidenced by my friend’s response. By the way, I’ve known that friend since we were a little monogamous family of 4, so she has seen my family go thru a lot of history and changes.

My friend is right that my family does as much as possible together. We spend family time together every evening (I’ll write more about that soon), we pray together before bed every night, we host fellowship meetings in our home together, we vacation together, we celebrate holidays together, we spend the Sabbath together. Even on a normal weekday full of homeschool, housework, errands, and childcare, we each interact quite a bit. I can see how a polygamous family living in separate houses could fall apart like Kody Brown’s seems to be. But we lived apart for the first 5 years after Melissa joined the family, and we still did what it took to be united.