“My cousin has two moms (and a dad)”

We live in the house we bought six years ago from Kody Brown. He lived in this house with 3 wives: Christine, Janelle, and Meri. (He married Robyn while the Brown family was living here.)

The house has 3 distinct apartments, which means three kitchens, three laundry rooms, many entrances, a single driveway (with many parking spots), and one huge utility bill, ha ha. Our dream house would also have a large communal area, but all in all, this house is awesome for a plural family.

Our family has only 2 wives. We have courted a potential third wife once or twice, but obviously it’s never worked out; you might be surprised how difficult it is to find a good fit for a well-established family, but those are stories for another time. I hope Joshua will have the opportunity to love 3 wives someday.

When referring to sections of the house, we freely use the word “house” for what might more accurately be called an apartment. But since that can get a little confusing I’ll just call them apartments. I live in the “apartment” formerly occupied by Meri Brown, and my sisterwife Melissa lives where Janelle Brown used to live. In the 3rd apartment (Christine Brown’s) lives some members of our extended family, including two of my nieces. (By the way, the family isn’t polygamous.)

Today, my nieces had a friend over whom I had never met. The 3 little girls were sitting on my porch steps, and I went past them on my way to the driveway. “Hello, girls!” I said. “Eating fudgsicles, eh? Yum!”

The older niece told her friend, “That’s my cousin’s mom.”

She was corrected by my younger niece: “One of her moms.”

Older niece: “Her husband is a polygamist!”

I didn’t hear what their young friend said in response. I just kept walking.

I was charmed by the innocence of the children freely sharing a fact about their aunt with no embarrassment or hesitation.

Later that day we were out in public, and we happened to see that same girl. Once again I thought about how we polygamists often just fit right in: You probably don’t even realize when you’re sharing the children’s museum or the swimming pool with polygamists.

Being introduced as one of my daughter’s moms is something that definitely wouldn’t have happened if I wasn’t a polygamist.

5 thoughts on ““My cousin has two moms (and a dad)”

  1. I am wondering, what do Mormons who practice polygamy think of other Christians that have, or desire polygamist families?

    It seems odd to me that the two don’t really align with each other to promote the lifestyle together.

    Just curious.


    1. Only speaking for myself, I think it’s wonderful when Christians successfully practice polygamy (or even desire to live that way).

      To your question, tho, my experience tells me that more generally, Mormons might not be so excited. In particular, the kind of Mormon who is in a fundamentalist Mormon sect will tend to believe that only their so-called priesthood leader has the proper authority from God to perform plural marriages and that everyone else is living in adulterous sin.

      It’s an interesting question. It makes me curious to ask some of my Mormon friends. Of course, most of my Mormon friends are more independent, think-for-yourself kind of people, so it still might not be the best representation.


      1. Thank you for your response and that is an interesting point of view that I hadn’t considered. I know there is a constant battle between regular Christians and the Mormon faith about who is in sin, so that does make sense. I have several friends in the LDS church and have always thought that Mormon families are some of the best families to model after. I know polygamy families are altogether different when it comes to LDS and Fundamentalist, but I do like their commitment to family. I never really have a problem between my faith in Christ and a Mormons faith. I don’t get caught up in the details. Christ is the center, and from what I can tell that is the Mormon faith as well, for the most part. Catholics have some strange beliefs too, but no one questions that.

        My family has come to an understanding of plural relationships many many years ago and I know many families that live that lifestyle but from a non Mormon belief. I have always wondered why the two differences don’t come together to try and convince society that we are all normal families just more people in them, but your comment does make it difficult for the two to come together.

        The other reason I have always though it would be to combine forces would be to counteract the other family structures that don’t honor God.

        I have another question, do families in your faith have a hard time finding potential sistewives for a family? The non Mormon families certainly do. It is really hard to meet single woman that can tolerate such a family structure, mainly because they have been taught from society AND THE CHURCH that it is the worst sin imaginable for a family. My family has been trying for over 10 years. We have had several courting attempts but in the end the woman always back out because they can’t deal with the difference in life that it will bring to them. Some are just too independent to be a part of a family.

        Anyway, I do enjoy your blog postings.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I agree that it would be nice if people of all faiths could unite over commonalities rather than focus on differences. At times, it happens on an individual level, of course.

          To answer your next question, yes, it is difficult to find women who want to become a plural wife. There are far more families looking for another wife than there are single women looking to join a plural family. This turns out to be a good thing for the women, because it means they get their choice of family to join.

          There’s a blog post by Taylor about the mathematics of polygamy: https://speakingofpolygamy.com/2018/02/25/dateonomics/
          To be honest, this is one of my favorite posts on my blog, and I didn’t even write it. Give that a read and tell me what you think.


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